sparc transit

True story: the now-former CEO of Sun Microsystems, the day after his company ignominiously succumbed to a buyout by Oracle, announced his inevitable resignation by posting a cute haiku to Twitter:

Financial crisis / Stalled too many customers / CEO no more.”

For those of us who watched Schwartz preside over the decade-long destruction of what was once the most important technology company in the world, this is a fitting final insult: revisionist, myopic, and self-serving to the bone.  Allow me to offer a handful of alternative epitaphs for Schwartz’s tenure, still in senryu format:

once upon a time / this company was money / bye-bye you suckers

golden parachute / drifts over palo alto / kiss your job good-bye

dot-com era cash / could not hold off the penguins / now larry owns us

we made cool shit once / spent a decade jacking off / so long, solaris

if you invested / cash in sun microsystems / you were a sucker

company called sun / build the goddamn internet / now long forgotten

datacenters full / of ultra enterprises / now gathering dust

Feel free to add your own.

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Well said.