Straight from the “I can’t make this up and if I try to comment I’ll start screaming and never, ever stop” files:
The Los Angeles Police Department is seeking the fast track for new laws to ban face coverings, gas masks or even goggles at public demonstrations, where the devices could weaken officers who want to control crowds with pepper spray and other chemicals. The proposal advanced this week after Police Commission members dismissed any First Amendment objections as premature.
Deputy Chief Mike Hillman, who heads the LAPD’s special operations bureau, told the commission it’s important to move quickly and get the laws on the books before expected anti-war demonstrations on March 20, the anniversary of the U.S. attack on Iraq. In fact, Hillman said, the LAPD would just as soon get the new rules in place to deal with an even earlier expected assault on public order — at the February 15 NBA All-Star Game at Staples Center.
If protesters wear scarves around their noses and mouths and swim goggles to protect their eyes at public gatherings, Hillman told the commission, “the ability of that officer to gain compliance is restricted.”
Sarcasm…powers…failing. Blood…pressure…rising. Must…not…explode.